Welcoming our tenth child was both a joy and a challenge. Over the years, I’ve experienced various birth settings—from hospital to home—but this time, I wanted something different. With a focus on deepening my trust in God and simplifying the birth process, we embarked on a journey of faith, family support, and finding peace in the unknown.
The Unexpected Yet Expected: Preparing for Our 10th Baby
When we discovered we were expecting our tenth baby, it was a surprise to some, but not so much to others. Our children have all been spaced about two years apart, and this one fit the pattern perfectly—another blessing in our ongoing adventure as parents. Over the years, I’ve given birth in different settings: two hospital births, one birthing center, and six home births with midwives. Each experience taught me something new, and each one built my confidence for the next.
Exploring Free Birth: A New Chapter
After our ninth baby’s birth, where the midwife almost didn’t make it, I realized I was comfortable with the idea of managing the birth on my own if needed. This sparked an interest in free birth, also known as unassisted birth. I was inspired by a woman who had shared her experiences of having excruciatingly painful births that eventually became blissful and even orgasmic. Her story intrigued me, especially since my labors have always been relatively short. For my tenth birth, I decided to try something new: no midwife, just my husband and me. This decision was both exciting and daunting, but I felt called to lean into it.
Laboring with Love: The Role of My Husband
My husband has always been a key part of my birthing process. He walks with me, encourages me, and applies pressure on my hips during contractions—a technique that has been incredibly helpful. However, in my pursuit of a free birth, I realized that I might have underestimated the importance of his emotional support. Looking back, I wish I had involved him more in the preparation, allowing him to be my true partner in this journey. His presence was crucial, and leaning on him emotionally could have enhanced our experience even more.
The Reality of Free Birth: Trusting My Body and God
As labor began, I was filled with a sense of peace, walking around our property and enjoying the beauty of the day. I spent time with my family, soaking in the calm before the contractions truly started. When they did, I relied on Christian Hypnobirthing to keep my mind focused on God’s word and to help me relax. The scripture, gentle music, and affirmations were exactly what I needed. However, as I entered transition, I found myself battling disappointment. Despite all my preparation, the intense pressure and pain were still there. I had hoped for a different outcome, perhaps even a pain-free, blissful birth. But the reality was that childbirth is challenging, no matter how much we prepare.
The Beauty and Challenge of Free Birth: A Reflection
In the end, our tenth baby was born with three strong pushes. The birth was filled with beauty and peace, but also with a bit of frustration. I had tried to replicate someone else’s experience, rather than building on what I already knew worked for me. This taught me an important lesson: while it’s good to try new things, it’s also important to trust in our own experiences and in God’s plan for us.
Lessons Learned: What I Would Do Differently
Looking back, there are things I would change and things I would keep the same. I would definitely continue using Christian Hypnobirthing, as it helped me focus on God’s truth. I would involve my husband more, allowing him to be my emotional support as well as my physical one. I would also let my daughters be in the room during the birth; I regret not having them there to witness the miracle of life. On the practical side, I would prepare more thoroughly for postpartum care, focusing on nourishing meals and physical recovery. And, I would consider having a midwife or birthworker Around or at least spending more time preparing my husband to be that support person for me.
Embracing God’s Plan in Birth and Life
Choosing a free birth for our tenth child was a journey of faith, filled with beauty, challenges, and valuable lessons. It reminded me that while we can prepare and plan, the true strength comes from trusting in God and in the way He created us. Each birth is a unique experience, shaped by our faith, our family, and our willingness to surrender to God’s plan. Despite the challenges, I wouldn’t trade these experiences for anything—they’ve deepened my trust in God and strengthened my love for my family. As I look back, I’m grateful for the lessons learned and the beautiful life we’ve brought into this world.
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