About

Love motherhood was born out of a desire to encourage my friends and enjoy some mom time. My husband Stephen came up with the name when we were looking for what to call our little coffee shop mom group. Our first day I grabbed some devotionals and above rubies magazines to share around the table. We spent our time with an encouragement and devotional, followed by prayer, coffee, and getting to know each other better. Nothing fancy, just a place to relax and share our hearts. Building each other up along the way.

Love motherhood is best described by looking at what the Bible has to say about these two words. 

What is Love? 1 Corinthians 13 gives us a perfect description of Love: 

The Greatest Gift

1Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I have become sounding brass or a clanging cymbal. 2And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing.  3And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body [a]to be burned, but have not love, it profits me nothing.

4Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not [b]puffed up;  5does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, [c]thinks no evil;  6does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth;  7bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

8Love never fails

When I reread this scripture as a young mom I recall intently thinking about love and realized at the time I may not be fully loving my family. For one thing, I was certainly not patient enough. I could also be envious, for example if my husband was dining at a nice restaurant on work travels. Or I struggled with pridefully desiring my own way. And my endurance during rough times I thought was questionable. “Lord, help!” I pleaded, “I thought I loved my children, I need your love.” Since that time it has been the desire of my heart to truly love people, my family especially, as the Bible describes.

Learning to Love

A few years ago my grandparents came to live with us after my grandmother suffered a stroke and heart attack. In years past, before the stroke my grandma was known for her spicy attitude at times.  After the stroke her demeanor changed significantly to mostly peaceful, along with more forgetfulness. But, she would have short episodes of frustration mixed with sadness too which boiled over and negatively affected everyone; sometimes yelling at the kids or rudely talking to us. I felt we needed to have a conversation about love. And I thought I needed to be direct because she was obviously wallowing in self pity. So, I simply told her she didn’t love us.  Oh boy, she was offended at first until I read to her what love is from the Bible. I shared my own struggle to love how God wants us to love.  Amazingly, her countenance softened.  We went from bristling grandma ready to punch us out to loving each other and hugging it out!  So we should remember love is not a feeling.  It is not the tender and emotional connection and joy I feel for my child, rather love takes action and is a self sacrifice!

What about Motherhood?

Does the Bible talk about motherhood? There are three passages that have helped form my opinions about God’s heart for motherhood:

Genesis 1:28

Then God blessed them, and God said to them, “Be fruitful and multiply; fill the earth and subdue it; have dominion over the fish of the sea, over the birds of the air, and over every living thing that moves on the earth

To accept that God wants to bless us with children is perhaps the primary prerequisite for a correct perspective for motherhood.  It is a perspective that flows against the grain these days. Though our current pop culture recognizes the hard work and sacrifice it takes to raise children, the typical viewpoint, for Christians as well, is to downplay or discourage building a family of more than one or two children.  The expectation for hard work and sacrifice is usually reason enough we surmise to avoid building families, however the current population control agenda and modern medical practices also work against God’s plan for His families.  

I feel the popular phrase “family planning” is misleading when it comes to how we think about raising children.  What exactly would be the plan and how audacious is it to attempt to “plan” a family in the first place? The reality is we’ve been duped into believing we’re in control.  And, isn’t it interesting that contemporary birth control methods are accepted by just about everyone for this “family planning” concept?  The propaganda has been strong for “family planning” and the source of it is not from God.   Couple the family planner mentality with a selfish, unloving generation, too afraid or naive of the work involved in building loving relationships and families, and the end result is the withering of the family tree.     

A funny story about myself and birth control happened right after I was married when I tried an herbal remedy I thought was supposed to help prevent pregnancy.  By that time in my life I had already begun the journey for natural healthy living.  I had researched the negative side effects of birth control pills and determined they were not an option.  But, I was still influenced unknowingly by one of the population control misnomers of waiting to have children.  So I began taking herbs that I thought would give my husband and I time to ourselves as newlyweds.  Instead, I mis-read the info on the Wild Yam herb, which is said to have the opposite effect and helps the baby implant more strongly.  I ended up pregnant one month after we were married and I can’t help but think the Wild Yam helped me to conceive a beautiful baby girl! 

Then, a few years later, I was introduced to a new way of thinking, when I was given a copy of the magazine “Above Rubies.” I sort of believed at the time I was open to as many kids as God would bless us with, however I was praying after every child up to that point, expecting God would give us permission to stop.  People always had the same question after every pregnancy whether it would be our last child.  I brought the same question to God every time and this is the answer I would be reminded of from Psalms: 

Psalm 127:3

Behold, children are a heritage from the LORD, The fruit of the womb is a reward.

Children Are a Blessing

It was only recently I began to realize the blessing God talks about isn’t just for me. I watch my children bless others all the time and bless God too! I questioned the blessing part often when I was alone in the trenches raising my five little ones while daddy might be gone weeks traveling for work. But, I was blessed by kisses, hugs, observing the growth and creativity in each child, and by their helping hands around the house and farm.  But my favorite thing has come to be watching my children use what they have learned from the Bible and what they observe from my husband and I.  There is no doubt our love for one another impacts how they treat each other and others around them. 

Older woman training younger woman: Titus 2

4that they admonish the young women to love their husbands, to love their children,  5to bediscreet, chaste, homemakers, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be blasphemed.

As mothers we are given the privilege of using our creativity and talents to make a home that is inviting, functional, restful, and beautiful. I like to say my home is my nest.  Although Pinterest and Instagram scream at us as to how our homes should look and feel, we are not obligated to make a picture of perfection but rather a place that works for each unique family. With a constantly growing family and the same three bedroom house for many years, I have changed things often to make things more comfortable and useful to us.

And then of course there is the proverbs 31 woman:

The Virtuous Wife

10Who[c] can find a [d]virtuous wife?
For her worth is far above rubies.
11The heart of her husband safely trusts her;
So he will have no lack of gain.
12She does him good and not evil
All the days of her life.
13She seeks wool and flax,
And willingly works with her hands.
14She is like the merchant ships,
She brings her food from afar.
15She also rises while it is yet night,
And provides food for her household,
And a portion for her maidservants.
16She considers a field and buys it;
From [e]her profits she plants a vineyard.
17She girds herself with strength,
And strengthens her arms.
18She perceives that her merchandise is good,
And her lamp does not go out by night.
19She stretches out her hands to the distaff,
And her hand holds the spindle.
20She extends her hand to the poor,
Yes, she reaches out her hands to the needy.
21She is not afraid of snow for her household,
For all her household is clothed with scarlet.
22She makes tapestry for herself;
Her clothing is fine linen and purple.
23Her husband is known in the gates,
When he sits among the elders of the land.
24She makes linen garments and sells them,
And supplies sashes for the merchants.
25Strength and honor are her clothing;
She shall rejoice in time to come.
26She opens her mouth with wisdom,
And on her tongue is the law of kindness.
27She watches over the ways of her household,
And does not eat the bread of idleness.
28Her children rise up and call her blessed;
Her husband also, and he praises her:
29“Many daughters have done well,
But you excel them all.”
30Charm is deceitful and beauty is passing,
But a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised.
31Give her of the fruit of her hands,
And let her own works praise her in the gates.

What a beautiful scripture! I was overwhelmed when I was first married. How was I going to do all of this? I now understand it is a lifetime journey. We all begin the motherhood journey with various levels of knowledge and skills, but we must never settle by constantly learning, growing, and becoming more skilled and accomplished homemakers. 

Do All to the Glory of God

The verses are not meant to send us into depression, but to give us goals and guidance as we seek God on how to best love our families. I love that the Proverbs 31 woman is business minded and sells linen garments.  I would love to do this myself one day, along with buying and selling a vineyard!

I am not perfect and don’t claim to have arrived at loving motherhood all the time, but it is my sincerest goal “To be hidden with Christ in God” in our everyday human pursuits. (Col 3:3) 

I like how Oswald Chambers writes in ‘My Utmost for His Highest,’ “We have a tendency to look for wonder in our experience, and we mistake heroic actions for real heroes. It’s one thing to go through a crisis grandly, yet quite another to go through every day glorifying God when there is no witness , no limelight, and no one paying attention to us… we want to be able to say, ‘Oh, I have had a wonderful call from God!’ But to do the most humbling tasks to the glory of God takes the Almighty God Incarnate working in us.”

I need help everyday to walk out 1 Corinthians 10:31 “…whatever you do, do all to the glory of God”